Our Featured Find

Super Mario Bros. Coin

Super Mario Bros. Coin

We’re the most common item found in this two-bit overworld, but as we warped down the ultrasonic tunnel black, what I saw was a rather uncommon glow.

               

Earlier Finds

The Piltdown Extinction

The Piltdown Extinction

Was the odd assortment of bones we spread before you, these femurs and skulls and scattered phalanges, evidence of a naturally integrated and simon-pure undertaking?
Untitled

Untitled

Every time I see a bird, I apologize. There but for the grace of . . . well, not God, certainly.
Care and Feeding of Your Piano

Care and Feeding of Your Piano

Even when you think you know your way around a new purchase, it goddamn pays to read the manual.
Swiss Kriss for President

Swiss Kriss for President

An unpaid pitchman, I even sent Kriss to Eisenhower. “Do it the Satchmo way and you’ll feel 10 years old.”
Swiss Kriss Diet

Swiss Kriss Diet

I’m a high-strutting yo-yo diet, the gut and down every year or so. But people fixate on my weight, like I got cancer. No, I got Swiss Kriss.
St. James Infirmary

St. James Infirmary

Two Freds, one the composer the other the tromboner. Got to have both or this hit would need a church organ donor.
The First Few A’s in St. James Infirmary

The First Few A’s in St. James Infirmary

That song’s first “A” didn’t show up, must’ve been sick. That “A” didn’t show up, could’ve been sick. Or maybe missed the call ’bout the gig between my lips.
What a Wonderful World

What a Wonderful World

The melody sounded like twinkle twinkle’s great uncle oompah loompah: “I see trees of green . . .” Label wasn’t seeing the same green cause they only offered me 5 c-notes.
Film Studies

Film Studies

I am pushing this bicycle twined with ribbons & flags & enormous bells through the elaborate marble lobby to the bar.
Funeral Practices of the Flooded Valley

Funeral Practices of the Flooded Valley

The long double row of skulls adorning the curved wooden bulkhead walls reminds us that in the midst of death we are in life.

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